It's Christmas and I'm Free!

 

                                                                                                - Photo by Jeff Petersen, 12 24 2008

I feel like Mel Gibson in Braveheart when he yelled, “FREEDOM!" ... except for the part about being eviscerated.

At last, my maniacal devotion to a daily Advent post is satiated, not because my neurotic need to fulfill my unspoken posting vow was accomplished, but because the sands of the Advent hourglass ran out.  At last, I’m free!

My own tendency toward obsessive compulsive behavior threw me over the edge of Blogging Rule #1. (Understand I have no knowledge of blogging rules, real or imagined, and I’m simply making up blogging Rule #1 as justification for everything that follows.) Blogging Rule #1 states, “Enjoy your own blog.” In a crazed attempt to abandon spontaneity and conform to the mundane pattern of a daily Advent post, I disturbed the cosmos, ripped a tear in the space/time continuum and traded life in the Circus Fun House for a prison cell on The Rock, with no hope of a Nicholas Cage rescue.

I hate routine. It makes me choke in claustrophobic angst. It’s disquieting.

Rule #1 is a good rule, possibly so important it could be labeled a “Rule of Thumb.” (This too is unfamiliar to me, but since I’m once again happy to be posting on my blog I am inclined toward joyous exaggeration and liberated hyperbole.) As a standardized “Rule of Thumb,” Rule #1 should never be ignored. Failure to adhere to Rule #1 could result in: excessive phlegm, nausea, headaches and gastronomic distress. Ongoing disregard for Rule #1 leads to several obnoxious behaviors including, but not limited to: spontaneous outbursts of unwanted advice, loud talking, boring blog posts and a horrifying condition commonly known as “The Sweats.” (It should be noted that “The Sweats” are similar to “The Miseries.” Nobody wants either one.)

Some reading this post may find this self-disclosure unsettling, so much so that you wish would could go back in time, thereby living in the blissful ignorance you enjoyed before learning of my disdain for boring routine.

Too late.

Now you know.

I love spontaneity, and now I’m free! I kept my promise to myself and posted about Advent every single day. Now I’m at liberty to post when I choose, what I choose, on the topics I choose.  I plan to once again let my blogs flow out of the purposes of God working in my life.

Oh, happy day! No longer shackled to the inane and ridiculous nature of self-imposed constraint, I’m back to blogging in full compliance with Rule #1.

FREEDOM!

2 Corinthians 8:5  -  This was totally spontaneous, entirely their own idea, and caught us completely off guard. What explains it was that they had first given themselves unreservedly to God and to us. The other giving simply flowed out of the purposes of God working in their lives.

Comments

[Amber Cox]

Dad, You are hilarious. As a frequent reader of your blog, I too am glad that you can break the cycle and blog with freedom again.

[Noah Kaye]

This is funny!! Wow! Hilarious. But, gifted writing. I really enjoy your blog and read almost daily. My name is Noah and I am a Pastor in Maryland. Peace to you, your family and your church!

[Jo Blacketor]

There are blogging rules?!