The Notion of Giving Advice

  - Photo by Aaron Beeson - 

Let’s consider the notion of “giving advice.” It’s long been the practice of old people (and by “old people” I mean anyone older than young people). Since I’m older than everyone younger than me, I’m taking advantage of the New Year to give advice.  So, if the shoe fits, wear it. (Though, by saying that, I don’t want you to think my advice is limited to footwear consultations.) 

 1.  Figure out who your four or five best friends are. You know what I’m talking about.  These are the people who listen to you, who know whether your spiritual and emotional trajectory is up or down and who care about how you’re “feeling” as much as they care about what you’re “doing.” I suggest you value those friends, nurture those relationships and “be a friend” worthy of such remarkable devotion. (By the way, if your spouse's list doesn't have you identified as such a caring "friend" you better step up your game at home. What are you thinking?)

 2.  Work hard on your marriage because the one you have, when you have no one else, is the one who promised God they’d love and cherish you “for better for worse, for richer for poorer,” until you are ultimately separated by death.  How about putting down your cell phone, turning off the TV and listening to them for a while? How about scheduling a date-night every single week this year? How about sitting together in church and worshiping God side-by-side in 2010?  Oh yeah, one more thing: since you are the only person in the whole world your spouse can have sex with, how about brushing your teeth and taking a shower more often?  Just sayin' ...

 3.  Join everyone at GCC and memorize 2 Peter 1:2-12 (NIV) by Easter. In that text you’ll learn what to do so you will never fall.

 4.  Stop being so easily irritated. It makes you an ugly person and it shrinks your spirit. The world's a mess. Stop cussing it and start fixing it. God will help you. Rather than being so easily offended, why not consciously resist your temptation to criticize so quickly? Don’t make assumptions about other’s motives (You’re not a mind-reader so stop pretending you know what others are thinking.) Stop being angry others are not more “mature.” Face it; they are as mature as they are. If you don’t like their current ability to cope, help them. If you're frustrated about their current understanding of the situation, stop and T.H.I.N.K. before you speak. Ask yourself if there is anything you can do to help them gain wisdom. Before you speak, make sure you’re about to say something, “True, Helpful, Important, Necessary and Kind."

 5.  Study the Bible. Read it. Meditate on it. Learn it. (You can get help at GCC so start bringing it with you.)

 6.  Finally, I think everyone would do well to set specific measurable goals in four areas of life: (1) family, (2) physical fitness, (3) friendships and (4) spiritual fitness. Do it like this. For each of the four areas finish this sentence, “Because I’m following Jesus, by Easter I will … .

There you go – old guy advice to young people. 

Proverbs 4:7  -  Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom, thought is cost all you have, get understanding.

Comments

[laura kiner]

always well spoken

[EdgarCabello]

Thanks for the advice, Mark. We're never to old or 'with-it' to get some good advice.

[Suzanne]

Thank you for these words.

[Robin Payne]

As always, your wisdom helps me see more clearly!

[brianburris]

Many don't know because no one has been bold enough to tell them what they need to hear. Thanks for being so bold.

[Ron S.]

I am an older father giving advice to a young son of 14, and I greatly appreciated this. We read your post together this evening after returning from church. It goes hand-in-hand with your message tonight and the purpose statement of Proverbs 1:1-9. Many thanks for these modern Proverbs.

[Lori Morlan]

Thank you for giving advice for those of us who don't have parents who give any. This advice is a prayer answered. I was just telling my sister how frustrating it is to have to parent our parents all the time. Sometimes it would be nice to hear encouraging words from a parental figure. God was listening. Please continue to give advice because I am receiving it and appreciating it.
Thank You Mark Beeson.

[Solid Thomas]

You know, Mark, I had thought about asking you for advice after your message today but decided not to. Now I find myself reading your blog and lo & behold, there is some advice. In fact, I think it directly addresses what I was thinking.

So, Thank you. And also Thank God for bringing you here and helping you with the wonderful establishment that is GCC. I am not alone in saying that I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for this blessing!

[Rosemarie pittinget]

Thank you for your bold, fresh honesty. I will definety set out to change my ways. So often we make things or others the issue, when we are the ones with the issue.
Rosemarie P

[J Aquila]

Mark,

Good stuff. In preparation for India (this March) I'm hitting the gym 3+ times a week, with a personal trainer, right up until the day before we leave. The Iron Man video from a few weeks back inspired me, and I don't want to burn out early during our time in Kalavai. Plus, I've been meaning to drop the extra pounds I've been packing for the last couple of years.

I know you heard Don Miller at the story conference, but I found his latest blog post to be encouraging about living out a good story and starting twenty-ten out with purpose ...

http://donmilleris.com/2010/01/01/living-a-good-story-an-alternative-to-new-years-resolutions/

J Aquila

[Kelly]

Priceless.

[Shannon]

Thank you for the words of advice. The first person I will share this with is my best friend, my husband. Already this year we have made changes in our lives to incorporate some of the things you mentioned in here. Now that I have read this, I feel we have a litle more work to do together but I know, we are on the right path.